Thursday, January 6, 2011

"Weak" 19 - Triplicate and Slump Busters


slump buster n. an unattractive woman sought by a man for sexual relations in order to improve his sports-playing abilities.

Llama Chaser Nation the Llama Chasers don't ask their fans for much but we need you now. I need at least 1 Slump Buster and could maybe use up to 3. I know we don't have any Slump Busters in our fan club but I am asking you to reach out to your not so attractive friends or co-workers. We lost all 7 points this week and now stand at 2-12 to start the second half. If we don't find a Slump Buster fast the season may be over. If anyone knows this chic on the motorcycle or someone that looks similar please send them over Brick's house today! He will then lend her to Tom and Kevin. As you can see from Brick's picture up top he had to wear the skirt all 3 games. His average is sinking faster than that motorcycle hottie would in a pool!!

I just wrote a whole bunch more but for some reason it was not saved so now you get the Cliffs Notes version.

Brick: In the worst slump of his career, looks average, at best, in a skirt. Bowled 152,145,191 - 488 series. Was in the skirt all 3 games but got out of it for at least the 1st game next week. Slump Buster need rating: 10, he needs one very, very bad!!

Tom: Bowled ok the first 2 games but then got jealous of the attention Brick was getting so he bowled a 137 so he could wear the skirt this week. Slump Buster need rating: 8, could use a quick roll in the hay.

Kevin: Knocked over enough pins to avoid the skirt 155, 146, 147 but that is about it. If you are going to bowl like crap all 3 games you could at least shoot for a triplicate patch you jackass. Slump Buster need rating: 7, certainly couldn't hurt.

Brandon: Continues to narrowly avoid the skirt, had a 150 in the first game. That is now 7 games Brandon has bowled at 150 or less and avoided the skirt. I expect his pants to be coming off in the near future. Slump Buster need rating: 4, this number would have been a 1 a few weeks back.

Ryan: The one bowler that understood we were tyring to win the second half. 213, 192, 187 - 592 series or the way I like to look at it, 104 pins over Brick's series. Bowled 2 llamas on the night and now has 13 llamas on the season, trailing only Brick's 20. Might we have a new Llama King? Slump Buster need rating: 0, no slump here, this kid is a stud!

We will see you tonight on the lanes!! If you enjoy bowling or seeing men in skirts you will have a great time.

REMEMBER: Bring a Slump Buster and get a free drink!!

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